Thursday, May 15, 2014

News from the Front

It's been awhile since I've posted an update on my own personal war on cancer, so that will be today's topic.

Overall, I continue to do very well, thanks be to God.

Physically, I am able to do nearly everything I need to, although I do struggle with fatigue, some nausea and vomiting, and mild to moderate pain from the bones mets.  Other, lesser side effects, such as nasal and skin problems, mouth sores, etc. also continue, but you know what?  I can live with all of this!

I am definitely not as sharp as I used to be.  Areas such as short term memory, multi-tasking, planning ahead and distractibility constantly plague me, but I am no longer embarrassed about these deficiencies.  They have simply become a part of who I am now.  Happily, I am still able to learn (and remember it for awhile) and help my kids with their school work, but if you ask me about a movie I saw a few months ago I am unlikely to remember having seen it.  Which can be fun if it was a good one, as I can experience it all over again!

I had a brain scan yesterday and the news was a bit of a mixed bag, but more good than not.  The tumor that was gamma knifed in February has shrunk substantially, but there are two others that seem to be slowly growing that we will need to continue to watch closely.  One was the tumor that was treated individually about two years ago with stereotactic radiation, which is unfortunate.  That means we only have one more shot at it before I hit max radiation for the area.  This, at the moment, is my greatest concern, but I am not worrying excessively about any of it.  It is what it is, and I have lots of wonderful things to distract me.

Thankfully, all other major organs remain clear and, outside of the brain, we are only battling bone metastases.  As  I have said many times, these will not kill me and are simply an annoyance to me for now.  I am probably going to have to deal with the large one at the top of my right femur and possibly another active spot or two in my ribs/spine and sacrum.  Not sure yet if it will be with targeted radiation or a change in medication, but either way I will take it as it comes.

I remain nothing but grateful for all the blessings I have received to help me along on this journey: my faith, my family and friends, the prayers of so many, my amazing doctors and excellent health insurance, my husband's job, etc., etc.  I have a happy life and, most importantly, am filled with hope for the future both here and in the world to come.

Notice I did not say "ordered" or "calm" when describing my life.  Although I have what I believe to be an unshakable inner peace, you will find no evidence of it if you drop by my house during the after-school witching hours, when chaos and disorder reigns!  During these hours of sports, homework, dinner, and general craziness I often get overwhelmed.  But I'm pretty sure that has nothing at all to do with the cancer, and everything to do with having seven beautiful, healthy children which, in my book, is no ailment at all.

4 comments:

Peggy said...

Suzanne, I only know of you through a couple of mutual friends but I follow your blog religiously because you are such an inspiration! (I don't have cancer but I share many of your symptoms: distractions, short term memory, can't remember this morning's Gospel...). Your faith and inner peace are remarkable. God has blessed you and Natalie with a big heart :). You are in my daily prayers for a cure. God bless you and your family.

emilyaoun said...

You never cease to amaze me! You truly are super woman! You and your beautiful family are always in our prayers!

Anonymous said...

praying for you
God bless
Antonia (England)

Barb said...

Thank you for the update...you remain in my daily prayers. =)