One thing about driving a fuel efficient car: it's not very fast going uphill. It COULD be, if I took it off of eco-mode, but since I got it for its gas mileage, I simply won't do that. Therefore, I have recently become accustomed to semi-irate people behind me, tailgating and gesturing until I can graciously move over and let them by. Now, I am not moving at unsafe speeds, mind you. I'm simply not engaging in the speed demonics of the drivers in my area, which irritates them to no end.
A few days ago, as I was moseying up a freeway on-ramp, I noticed a motorcycle so close on my tail that I could hardly see him in my rearview mirror. I was thinking to myself, "That's really not smart, to tailgate someone so closely especially when on a motorcycle."
Simultaneously, I noticed Bella, who in this car can easily reach the window button for the first time in her young life, dangling a little pink purse out the window. I had just finished talking to her about this on our last car ride. I explained that if she let go of whatever toy she was holding, she would never see it again. She seemed to take it to heart and rolled up her window at the time, but here she was just a few hours later doing it again. I had not noticed earlier or else I would have rolled up the window and engaged the lock.
Before I could fully process these two concurrent events, I witnessed, in my rearview mirror, the pink purse fly out of Bella's grasp and solidly thwack the motorcyclist in the head. Thankfully, he did not swerve or falter (for if he had, this story wouldn't be quite so amusing). I watched in horror as he removed one hand from his handlebars so that it could be put to maximum gesturing use. He shook his fist, he gave me a, "What the heck?!" and then he passed me on the left. All of this happened in a split second. Bella still hadn't even time to understand that she had lost her purse.
As I slowly began to understand what had just happened (about the time Bella let out the first of a solid 20 minute wall of wails), I was struck with the poetic justice of it all. Dangle a toy out of the window? You will surely lose it. Tailgate at a dangerous distance? You're sure to regret it.
How lovely to quite passively instruct both a preschooler and a motorcyclist in one fell swoop.