After a bit of a rough start with reading in 1st grade, Natalie is suddenly on fire. She reads everything and anything she can. She is reading at least one Dr. Seuss book to me every night and reads them to herself when I am not available. She reads signs, labels and anything else she can find. Along with this jump in reading, she has begun writing independent notes including big words that I can usually understand, even with the often phonetic spelling.
Tonight, after she cruised through a Dr. Seuss book she actually had not heard or read before (The Foot Book) she read The Pigeon Has Feelings Too, something I have read to her several times in the past. She got hung up on the word 'wait'. I reminded her of the rule, "When two vowels go walking, the first one does the talking." She looked at me silently for a minute, so I prompted her, "Which vowel does the talking in this word?"
Without hesitation, she announced proudly, "W!"
Hmmm, I guess we still have some work to do.
Sunday, March 15, 2015
Tuesday, March 10, 2015
Latest Scan News
I had my bi-monthly brain scan yesterday. I am happy to report that things are more or less still stable in my gray matter. I still have three "spots" that grow and shrink over time. This time, one shrunk and two stayed the same. My doctor remains pleased and will see me again in May.
Aside from a reappearance of a previously squelched tumor on my sacrum (no one is stressing at all about this), all appears quiet and peaceful in the battleground of my body. I am sure that the situation is quite different on a molecular level, as a constant flow of chemicals stays busy chasing down cancer cells 24/7, but, as they say, a picture tells a thousand words!
Aside from a reappearance of a previously squelched tumor on my sacrum (no one is stressing at all about this), all appears quiet and peaceful in the battleground of my body. I am sure that the situation is quite different on a molecular level, as a constant flow of chemicals stays busy chasing down cancer cells 24/7, but, as they say, a picture tells a thousand words!
A Few More Photos from Savannah
Jen, Lori and me in Forsyth Park
The outside of the building we stayed in ("Lucky Lincoln" VBO)
A typical historical residential neighborhood
The inside of our abode...beautiful!
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Best breakfast ever at Clary's...corned beef hash, fluffy biscuits, YUMMY!
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Altogether a fantastic weekend with my dear friends...where shall we go next year?
Friday, March 06, 2015
Savannah Day 1
It's our annual girls getaway weekend! I suppose at some point we are going to have to stop using the word "girls", but let's not talk about that now.
At any rate, Jennifer, Lori and I are having a great time so far in lovely, historic Savannah, Georgia. Here are some pictures of our first day's adventures...
At any rate, Jennifer, Lori and I are having a great time so far in lovely, historic Savannah, Georgia. Here are some pictures of our first day's adventures...
Mass and Stations of the Cross at St. John the Baptist Cathedral
This photo doesn't do justice to the amazing interior.
Me with a statue of Juliette Gordon Low, the founder of the Girl Scouts
at her family home and birthplace
All three of us in her garden
On the river walk...yes it was very cold here today, but at least it finished raining last night!
Juliette and I, wearing our classic Girl Scout duds
Tomorrow we will be visiting the Pirate's House (circa 1754), Forest Gump's bus stop bench, Forsyth Park, City Market and Paula Deen's Lady and Son's restaurant for dinner. Fun, fun, fun!
Tuesday, March 03, 2015
The San Francisco Fire of 2015
San Francisco's Archbishop Cordileone has done something shocking.
He has asked the teachers and staff at the four Catholic high schools in his diocese to refrain from promoting anti-Catholic doctrine in the work place.
Can you believe how radical this is? To ask someone employed at a Catholic High School in a very influential role to avoid expressing personal opinions in the classroom when they are contrary to church teaching?
These are Catholic schools. Of course they should be teaching Catholic morality! The church's position on issues such as abortion, same sex marriage and contraception has not changed in 2000 years. I truly don't understand why someone who doesn't agree with the church in these areas or any others would even apply for a job at a Catholic school unless they specifically wanted to influence the youth against it.
I further cannot understand why a parent would enroll their child in a Catholic school if they didn't want them to receive a Catholic education. There have been countless parents opposed to the Archbishop's request and this simply doesn't make sense. If you enroll your child in a Jewish school you don't expect him to learn about Christ, do you? The are plenty of secular private high schools in the Bay Area that give parents the benefits of a private school but the secularism of a school without any faith education at all. If you don't agree with church teaching, please don't involve yourself with a Catholic school and try to strip it of the items you don't believe in. The Catholic church is very straightforward about what it stands for, and the last time I checked we still live in a nation that supports religious freedom. We are free to practice whatever it is we believe in and free to choose and education for our children that is in alignment with our own values.
This firestorm has made me so very sad because it highlights for me exactly how disconnected people have become with our beautiful faith. Archbishop Cordileone, I thank you for trying to keep your Catholic Schools Catholic!
He has asked the teachers and staff at the four Catholic high schools in his diocese to refrain from promoting anti-Catholic doctrine in the work place.
Can you believe how radical this is? To ask someone employed at a Catholic High School in a very influential role to avoid expressing personal opinions in the classroom when they are contrary to church teaching?
These are Catholic schools. Of course they should be teaching Catholic morality! The church's position on issues such as abortion, same sex marriage and contraception has not changed in 2000 years. I truly don't understand why someone who doesn't agree with the church in these areas or any others would even apply for a job at a Catholic school unless they specifically wanted to influence the youth against it.
I further cannot understand why a parent would enroll their child in a Catholic school if they didn't want them to receive a Catholic education. There have been countless parents opposed to the Archbishop's request and this simply doesn't make sense. If you enroll your child in a Jewish school you don't expect him to learn about Christ, do you? The are plenty of secular private high schools in the Bay Area that give parents the benefits of a private school but the secularism of a school without any faith education at all. If you don't agree with church teaching, please don't involve yourself with a Catholic school and try to strip it of the items you don't believe in. The Catholic church is very straightforward about what it stands for, and the last time I checked we still live in a nation that supports religious freedom. We are free to practice whatever it is we believe in and free to choose and education for our children that is in alignment with our own values.
This firestorm has made me so very sad because it highlights for me exactly how disconnected people have become with our beautiful faith. Archbishop Cordileone, I thank you for trying to keep your Catholic Schools Catholic!
Monday, March 02, 2015
Just Say NO!
I guess you could call me a "yes" girl. I want to say yes to everyone about everything. Yes, I can attend the thing you want me to go to, yes I can have lunch next week, yes we can get ice cream after school, yes I can serve on this or that board or committee, yes I will get you the school supplies or clothing you need tonight, right now, etc., etc., etc.
Because of this tendency I have, my life has become far too busy. Each week I find myself out of the house (always for a "good" reason) 3 or more nights a week. When Jay is traveling, as he often does, that leaves the older kids or grandma in charge, and that is not fair to any of us. My kids need me home more, and I want to spend my time with them rather than driving all over or out of the valley to do something that likely won't matter a few months from now.
I kid you not, THREE times in the last several weeks from THREE different people I trust very much to lead me down the right path have independently told me to learn to say "NO!". And to not feel guilty about it.
This is easier said than done because all the things I do feel important to me. Most of them I do for my children or for their schools, but at least two are for me: weekly choir practice and once a month faith formation.
Nonetheless, I see my children growing up so rapidly and, thinking about the time I miss with them while I am fulfilling parent hours or inefficiently reacting to an individual's needs, makes me want to cry. God has given me a true second chance at life and I want to spend every minute I can with my family.
This Lent I am trying to not make any new commitments, trying to scale down to reasonable the ones I already have and am arranging them to take place as much as possible when the kids are in school. I am also working on bringing as many of my children with me as want to come when I go to the grocery store or bank or anywhere else I would prefer to just go myself. I am trying to say yes to the requests of the children to read with them or play a board game with them, and am forcing myself to stop what I am doing to look at them when they are telling me something. I know these things sound like basic courtesy, but some days they are a real struggle for me.
Please know that my intention in declining an invitation to a social event or meeting, to be a team mom, a leader of any kind or even a participant in a new group or club or sport is a good one. It's not that I don't want to join you...I just want to be at home with my kids before they grow up and don't want to snuggle or play board games with me anymore. I'll have plenty of time, God willing, to do all those extracurricular things when my children are grown and gone.
Because of this tendency I have, my life has become far too busy. Each week I find myself out of the house (always for a "good" reason) 3 or more nights a week. When Jay is traveling, as he often does, that leaves the older kids or grandma in charge, and that is not fair to any of us. My kids need me home more, and I want to spend my time with them rather than driving all over or out of the valley to do something that likely won't matter a few months from now.
I kid you not, THREE times in the last several weeks from THREE different people I trust very much to lead me down the right path have independently told me to learn to say "NO!". And to not feel guilty about it.
This is easier said than done because all the things I do feel important to me. Most of them I do for my children or for their schools, but at least two are for me: weekly choir practice and once a month faith formation.
Nonetheless, I see my children growing up so rapidly and, thinking about the time I miss with them while I am fulfilling parent hours or inefficiently reacting to an individual's needs, makes me want to cry. God has given me a true second chance at life and I want to spend every minute I can with my family.
This Lent I am trying to not make any new commitments, trying to scale down to reasonable the ones I already have and am arranging them to take place as much as possible when the kids are in school. I am also working on bringing as many of my children with me as want to come when I go to the grocery store or bank or anywhere else I would prefer to just go myself. I am trying to say yes to the requests of the children to read with them or play a board game with them, and am forcing myself to stop what I am doing to look at them when they are telling me something. I know these things sound like basic courtesy, but some days they are a real struggle for me.
Please know that my intention in declining an invitation to a social event or meeting, to be a team mom, a leader of any kind or even a participant in a new group or club or sport is a good one. It's not that I don't want to join you...I just want to be at home with my kids before they grow up and don't want to snuggle or play board games with me anymore. I'll have plenty of time, God willing, to do all those extracurricular things when my children are grown and gone.
Sunday, March 01, 2015
Do What You Love
Joey has a job. He has spent the last three months employed as a ski/snowboard instructor at Mountain High, a ski resort about an hour away from our house.
My first job was at Kentucky Fried Chicken. For real.
Needless to say, he is very happy with his situation. He teaches 7-10 year olds of various levels how to learn or improve in their chosen snow genre. Before this season, he didn't understand why anyone would ski, as snowboarding was so clearly superior to skiing, but now he has discovered an equal appreciation for both.
He really is the perfect man-child for the job. He is passionate about mountain snow sports, he has always had a particular talent for them, and as the oldest of our seven children he has plenty of experience applicable to rounding up a class full of kids. It has become his habit to spend his weekends lunching with his young proteges, and has consumed many a plate of dino-shaped chicken nuggets with carrots and ranch dressing. I love picturing this.
Along with this job has come a bank account and a debit card, so things are changing a bit around here. He fully funds his own account and has access to the money he has earned. Mostly he is saving for accessories for his Jeep, but I know it is nice for him to be able to get food when he wants without having to ask us for money. The statement comes to us every month and we can always check online to see how he is managing his money. It is a good first step to financial freedom.
Today Tony took Joey's beginning ski class. It is the first time this season he has made it up the mountain, so he was very excited. He had the choice between taking the beginning ski class or the higher level snowboarding class with another instructor. Tony is a devoted snowboarder and his choice reflected his admiration and love for his big brother. It really made me happy.
What made me even happier was that his lesson was free and his lift ticket was free based on Joey's work credits. Every certain number of hours worked earns Joey a free lift ticket and he used this one on Tony. Good boy!
Sam, by the way, doesn't need any lessons. Joey taught him long before he was a pro. I doubt Sam will ever try skis. Julia and Bella also prefer to snowboard while Lindsey, Jay and I are sticking with what we know--skis. Natalie has yet to give snow sports a try...she'd rather build a snowman.
The only problem with a job like Joey's is that it is dependent on the weather. In a state dealing with a serious drought, it has been a year with little snow. What snow we have received has melted quickly and it is too warm most days to blow snow. Last week the Winter Sports school was closed due to poor conditions and Joey thought the season was over, but lo and behold a decent storm showed up this weekend and dumped fresh powder just in time. The snow was so good today that after his classes he stayed up and skied several hours with friends. (Don't worry, we remembered to pick Tony up at the end of his lesson.)
Jay and I are happy to see him getting work experience (especially the kind that makes him get out of the house on time because he is accountable to his students), and the fact that he is doing what he loves to do is really beautiful. The way he has figured out how to get to mass each weekend at various times and places according to his schedule makes us proud.
Jobs are a part of life and so much of how we perceive ourselves comes from our success in employment. if you can find a way to do what really inspires you and get paid for it too, that is about as good as it gets. I hope his future career will give him as much satisfaction as this first job has!
My first job was at Kentucky Fried Chicken. For real.
Needless to say, he is very happy with his situation. He teaches 7-10 year olds of various levels how to learn or improve in their chosen snow genre. Before this season, he didn't understand why anyone would ski, as snowboarding was so clearly superior to skiing, but now he has discovered an equal appreciation for both.
He really is the perfect man-child for the job. He is passionate about mountain snow sports, he has always had a particular talent for them, and as the oldest of our seven children he has plenty of experience applicable to rounding up a class full of kids. It has become his habit to spend his weekends lunching with his young proteges, and has consumed many a plate of dino-shaped chicken nuggets with carrots and ranch dressing. I love picturing this.
Along with this job has come a bank account and a debit card, so things are changing a bit around here. He fully funds his own account and has access to the money he has earned. Mostly he is saving for accessories for his Jeep, but I know it is nice for him to be able to get food when he wants without having to ask us for money. The statement comes to us every month and we can always check online to see how he is managing his money. It is a good first step to financial freedom.
Today Tony took Joey's beginning ski class. It is the first time this season he has made it up the mountain, so he was very excited. He had the choice between taking the beginning ski class or the higher level snowboarding class with another instructor. Tony is a devoted snowboarder and his choice reflected his admiration and love for his big brother. It really made me happy.
What made me even happier was that his lesson was free and his lift ticket was free based on Joey's work credits. Every certain number of hours worked earns Joey a free lift ticket and he used this one on Tony. Good boy!
Sam, by the way, doesn't need any lessons. Joey taught him long before he was a pro. I doubt Sam will ever try skis. Julia and Bella also prefer to snowboard while Lindsey, Jay and I are sticking with what we know--skis. Natalie has yet to give snow sports a try...she'd rather build a snowman.
The only problem with a job like Joey's is that it is dependent on the weather. In a state dealing with a serious drought, it has been a year with little snow. What snow we have received has melted quickly and it is too warm most days to blow snow. Last week the Winter Sports school was closed due to poor conditions and Joey thought the season was over, but lo and behold a decent storm showed up this weekend and dumped fresh powder just in time. The snow was so good today that after his classes he stayed up and skied several hours with friends. (Don't worry, we remembered to pick Tony up at the end of his lesson.)
Jay and I are happy to see him getting work experience (especially the kind that makes him get out of the house on time because he is accountable to his students), and the fact that he is doing what he loves to do is really beautiful. The way he has figured out how to get to mass each weekend at various times and places according to his schedule makes us proud.
Jobs are a part of life and so much of how we perceive ourselves comes from our success in employment. if you can find a way to do what really inspires you and get paid for it too, that is about as good as it gets. I hope his future career will give him as much satisfaction as this first job has!
Tuesday, February 24, 2015
Family Movie Night
For the first time in forever...there'll be music, there'll be lights.
Sorry, I couldn't help myself. The movie Frozen has infiltrated our lives so completely that I hear the lyrics in all sorts of unexpected places.
Anyway, what I meant to say is that for the first time in forever, we were all home this evening! (Well, except for Joey who was home for awhile but then went to a basketball playoff game, but 9 out of 10 is not bad!).
Normally, Friday nights are our family movie nights, but tonight we decided to watch Big Hero 6 since we were (mostly) all together. I made Pasta e Fagioli in the slow cooker and everyone got homework done early so we were ready to go.
This is a very cute family movie. Everyone enjoyed it, from Natalie (who fell soundly asleep about half way through) to Grandma. Some of us had seen it before but some hadn't. And others of us, (specifically those who have had way too much brain radiation), couldn't quite remember the details, or even the basic plot, so it was just like seeing it for the first time!
The movie's plot is totally original, the setting is fun and creative, and the message is a good one.
Plus, Baymax is far more endearing than Olaf (sorry, but it had to be said). But best of all? No catchy lyrics or songs of any kind! Most of you know how much I love to sing, but seriously, enough is enough. No more Frozen songs!
In conclusion, our family recommendation is: 9 thumbs up!
Sorry, I couldn't help myself. The movie Frozen has infiltrated our lives so completely that I hear the lyrics in all sorts of unexpected places.
Anyway, what I meant to say is that for the first time in forever, we were all home this evening! (Well, except for Joey who was home for awhile but then went to a basketball playoff game, but 9 out of 10 is not bad!).
Normally, Friday nights are our family movie nights, but tonight we decided to watch Big Hero 6 since we were (mostly) all together. I made Pasta e Fagioli in the slow cooker and everyone got homework done early so we were ready to go.
This is a very cute family movie. Everyone enjoyed it, from Natalie (who fell soundly asleep about half way through) to Grandma. Some of us had seen it before but some hadn't. And others of us, (specifically those who have had way too much brain radiation), couldn't quite remember the details, or even the basic plot, so it was just like seeing it for the first time!
The movie's plot is totally original, the setting is fun and creative, and the message is a good one.
Plus, Baymax is far more endearing than Olaf (sorry, but it had to be said). But best of all? No catchy lyrics or songs of any kind! Most of you know how much I love to sing, but seriously, enough is enough. No more Frozen songs!
In conclusion, our family recommendation is: 9 thumbs up!
Monday, February 23, 2015
Valentine's Day Tony Style and a Newly Minted 8 Year Old
For Valentine's Day, a few of my kids were asked to take shoeboxes and create a receptacles for their in-class valentines. Over the years we have had some exceptionally creative ones come from the boys in the family. I wish I had a picture of the one Sam did a few years ago. He cut a big hole in the top and attached a flexible dryer vent and painted the whole thing red and silver. It looked like a valentine vacuum.
I do, however have a picture to share of Tony's. He asked for a shoebox, banged around for awhile looking for supplies and a hot glue gun, and then came back an hour or so later with this:
I do, however have a picture to share of Tony's. He asked for a shoebox, banged around for awhile looking for supplies and a hot glue gun, and then came back an hour or so later with this:
The detail is difficult to see, but there is a pink tongue at the bottom and blood-tinged teeth all around. Seriously, the kid is 9 and does WAY better crafts than I do. He found all the supplies, figured out how to glue the lid so that it stayed open, and only suffered a minor finger burn from a drip of the glue gun. The result was a tie for the cutest valentine box I have ever seen come out of our family.
The girls' boxes have been nice too, don't get me wrong. Hearts, flowers, love, lace, etc. Just a tad more predictable.
Speaking of the girls, we have a new 8 year old in the family! Bella successfully completed her 8th year of life yesterday. Yay Bella! If you can recall that far back, I posted a photo of her each month during her first year...seems I had more time back then! Anyway, check out 2007 blogs for her first year progression if you are interested. Here she is at 8 years:
Time does fly. Happy birthday, Bella, and I look forward to celebrating many more birthdays with you!
Wednesday, February 18, 2015
Ash Wednesday
Happy Lent, everyone!
Today I begin again with this blog, a blog which has been dormant for quite some time due to its owner's sad neglect. It is here that I announce before all that during the 6 weeks of Lent I commit to post something at least 3 times per week. There. I said it.
Now I must do it.
It's not that I don't love to write. It's not that I don't have a million things to say. It's just that I am so, so busy all the time lately! I naively thought things would get easier when the kids got older, but just the opposite has happened. Although my days are free from 8-3 when the kids are in school, I gobble up that time with daily mass, grocery shopping, changing the oil in the cars, dealing with paperwork of various kinds, picking up my disordered house, putting dinner in the slow-cooker, planning someone's birthday party, taking kids to doctor, dentist, orthodontist appointments, etc. Evenings are homework, gymnastics, girl scouts, etc. I literally have no time. I know many of you can relate to this. Even when I get my chemo, I am on my computer the whole time paying bills and balancing my checkbook.
Nonetheless...I feel called during this Lenten season to return to blogging and see where it goes. I hope you will join me once again as I attempt to breath life back into Raising Saints, something I enjoy doing so much.
Here we go!
Today I begin again with this blog, a blog which has been dormant for quite some time due to its owner's sad neglect. It is here that I announce before all that during the 6 weeks of Lent I commit to post something at least 3 times per week. There. I said it.
Now I must do it.
It's not that I don't love to write. It's not that I don't have a million things to say. It's just that I am so, so busy all the time lately! I naively thought things would get easier when the kids got older, but just the opposite has happened. Although my days are free from 8-3 when the kids are in school, I gobble up that time with daily mass, grocery shopping, changing the oil in the cars, dealing with paperwork of various kinds, picking up my disordered house, putting dinner in the slow-cooker, planning someone's birthday party, taking kids to doctor, dentist, orthodontist appointments, etc. Evenings are homework, gymnastics, girl scouts, etc. I literally have no time. I know many of you can relate to this. Even when I get my chemo, I am on my computer the whole time paying bills and balancing my checkbook.
Nonetheless...I feel called during this Lenten season to return to blogging and see where it goes. I hope you will join me once again as I attempt to breath life back into Raising Saints, something I enjoy doing so much.
Here we go!
Wednesday, October 29, 2014
I'm Still Here
Hello again! Long time no post. I thought it was about time I let you know that I am still among you, and am just too busy and exhausted to post regularly.
The good news is that the Taxol/Perjeta/Herceptin/Xeloda combination is working very well. My last scan showed no evidence of disease from the neck down, and that is the very first time I have achieved that since my initial diagnosis. It took an aggressive combination to knock out bone metastasis that would just not go away. Further, my one small brain tumor did not grow at all in 2 months. We will check it again in a few weeks, but for now all is well.
The bad news is that this combo of medications has really taken its toll on me. I struggle to make it through my days and rely on medication to get me through the worst of it. I vomit nearly daily and have little to no notice it is coming. If it wasn't such a disgusting topic, I would post a collection of horrifying yet hysterical-in-retrospect vomit moments from the last three months. I have quite a list, and it continues to grow. More than anything, though, I am tired, tired, tired. I feel (and yes, I know this is ridiculous), like I have become the laziest person on earth. All I want to do is sleep and watch TV. Yet, being the mother of seven is not compatible with this plan, so I get up and go.
There are bright spots, too. Every four to six weeks my treatments line up so that I get a whole week without any chemo at all. When this happens I perk up and start frantically catching up with all I missed doing during the prior weeks (further evidence that the inherent laziness is only a myth, but I am still unwilling to accept it).
In other news, my mom has moved in with us and that is working out very nicely. She has had some medical problems and we didn't like having her on her own, so now she's not! I am using some of my "spare time" to get her house cleaned out and hopefully rented by the first of the year. Or so. It is lovely to have her here and she is a great help with the kids, helping with homework, hanging out with them and driving when she can.
Blessings to all of you and until next time (whenever that may be...), take care!
The good news is that the Taxol/Perjeta/Herceptin/Xeloda combination is working very well. My last scan showed no evidence of disease from the neck down, and that is the very first time I have achieved that since my initial diagnosis. It took an aggressive combination to knock out bone metastasis that would just not go away. Further, my one small brain tumor did not grow at all in 2 months. We will check it again in a few weeks, but for now all is well.
The bad news is that this combo of medications has really taken its toll on me. I struggle to make it through my days and rely on medication to get me through the worst of it. I vomit nearly daily and have little to no notice it is coming. If it wasn't such a disgusting topic, I would post a collection of horrifying yet hysterical-in-retrospect vomit moments from the last three months. I have quite a list, and it continues to grow. More than anything, though, I am tired, tired, tired. I feel (and yes, I know this is ridiculous), like I have become the laziest person on earth. All I want to do is sleep and watch TV. Yet, being the mother of seven is not compatible with this plan, so I get up and go.
There are bright spots, too. Every four to six weeks my treatments line up so that I get a whole week without any chemo at all. When this happens I perk up and start frantically catching up with all I missed doing during the prior weeks (further evidence that the inherent laziness is only a myth, but I am still unwilling to accept it).
In other news, my mom has moved in with us and that is working out very nicely. She has had some medical problems and we didn't like having her on her own, so now she's not! I am using some of my "spare time" to get her house cleaned out and hopefully rented by the first of the year. Or so. It is lovely to have her here and she is a great help with the kids, helping with homework, hanging out with them and driving when she can.
Blessings to all of you and until next time (whenever that may be...), take care!
Friday, August 22, 2014
Loving the GPS
I have a new GPS app called Waze. It has a social media aspect to it and uses data from its users to route you most effectively from point A to point B. Since using this program, I have driven through many neighborhoods I would have never otherwise seen and am alerted to things like accidents, stalls and even police officers and photo lights lurking ahead. I have learned not to question the route it gives me, even if it seems illogical, as it always turns out that Waze knows more than I do. Unlike Siri.
This morning, on my way to Cedars-Sinai, it sent me up Beverly Glen and down Bedford through Beverly Hills. What beautiful houses I got to see, all the while avoiding the near-standstill freeway traffic. If you don't currently have this app, I highly recommend it!
I realize that it may seem a bit strange to post something like this after a two month blog silence, but I had to start somewhere! Summer slipped away from me, but now that the kids are back in school, hopefully I will have more time to slow down and notice the many blessings around me and take the time to share them here.
This summer was full of wonderful craziness--an exchange student from Valencia, Spain (Maria, whom we all fell in love with), trips to Hawaii and Disneyland, as well as a few local beach days. It seems like we never stopped.
Another thing that never stopped is the chemo, chemo and more chemo. I am still not loving Taxol but am obviously tolerating it well enough to run around like a crazy person. I have brain scan next month to check on some slow-growing tumors, but other than that, there is not a lot to report. Anyone who sees me semi-regularly knows I have lost my hair, but am consoling myself with a little retail therapy and have found a number of chemo beanies and hats that actually make me feel chic rather than bald!
The kids are doing well. Joey is starting tight end on Varsity and thinking about college. He takes his driving test at the end of this month. Lindsey just started Paraclete high school and signed up for 6 different clubs (love that enthusiasm!). Sam is thriving in 8th grade and football, happier than I have ever seen him. Julia is back at Sacred Heart for 6th grade after a year of exploring the wonders of public school, is still an excellent student and a talented gymnast. Tony is in 3rd grade, loving Pee Wee football. Bella is preparing for her First Holy Communion in 2nd grade while cheering for Pee Wee football and taking gymnastics as well. Natalie started Sacred Heart as a 1st grader and is also cheering for Tony. I am exhausted all over again, just reading through this, but everyone is happy and busy.
Jay is doing great, loves his job at IBM, still travels quite a bit, and has kicked up his daily workouts to monumental heights (in my estimation, anyway). Wherever he is, he finds a gym. I have to admire his tenacity as I will use any excuse I can find to NOT exercise. He says it makes him feel great. I'll have to take his word for it.
So, all is well, one day at a time is my motto (sometimes one hour at a time). Hope all is equally well with my cyber readers!
This morning, on my way to Cedars-Sinai, it sent me up Beverly Glen and down Bedford through Beverly Hills. What beautiful houses I got to see, all the while avoiding the near-standstill freeway traffic. If you don't currently have this app, I highly recommend it!
I realize that it may seem a bit strange to post something like this after a two month blog silence, but I had to start somewhere! Summer slipped away from me, but now that the kids are back in school, hopefully I will have more time to slow down and notice the many blessings around me and take the time to share them here.
This summer was full of wonderful craziness--an exchange student from Valencia, Spain (Maria, whom we all fell in love with), trips to Hawaii and Disneyland, as well as a few local beach days. It seems like we never stopped.
Another thing that never stopped is the chemo, chemo and more chemo. I am still not loving Taxol but am obviously tolerating it well enough to run around like a crazy person. I have brain scan next month to check on some slow-growing tumors, but other than that, there is not a lot to report. Anyone who sees me semi-regularly knows I have lost my hair, but am consoling myself with a little retail therapy and have found a number of chemo beanies and hats that actually make me feel chic rather than bald!
The kids are doing well. Joey is starting tight end on Varsity and thinking about college. He takes his driving test at the end of this month. Lindsey just started Paraclete high school and signed up for 6 different clubs (love that enthusiasm!). Sam is thriving in 8th grade and football, happier than I have ever seen him. Julia is back at Sacred Heart for 6th grade after a year of exploring the wonders of public school, is still an excellent student and a talented gymnast. Tony is in 3rd grade, loving Pee Wee football. Bella is preparing for her First Holy Communion in 2nd grade while cheering for Pee Wee football and taking gymnastics as well. Natalie started Sacred Heart as a 1st grader and is also cheering for Tony. I am exhausted all over again, just reading through this, but everyone is happy and busy.
Jay is doing great, loves his job at IBM, still travels quite a bit, and has kicked up his daily workouts to monumental heights (in my estimation, anyway). Wherever he is, he finds a gym. I have to admire his tenacity as I will use any excuse I can find to NOT exercise. He says it makes him feel great. I'll have to take his word for it.
So, all is well, one day at a time is my motto (sometimes one hour at a time). Hope all is equally well with my cyber readers!
Tuesday, June 17, 2014
So Many Things
As usual, life has gotten away from me and I haven't posted in a long time. Yet, so many things have happened in the time since my last post, I couldn't decide what to write about first. So, I decided to do a condensed version of everything right here.
Most significantly, on Memorial Day we lost Jay's mom Elizabeth Lester at the age of 80. She lived about two miles away from us and was very involved in the kids' lives. She was a great help to us all in terms of driving the kids home from school and taking them to buy the things they needed, bringing dinner over regularly, delivering things we needed from Costco, etc. Losing her was a big blow to our family and we miss her. She loved to take the kids to the zoo, the library and many other places, even when it got hard for her.
Liz had a peaceful and happy death, which is all any of us can ask for. We have known for about a year and a half that she had an ocular melanoma and, as she chose no treatment, that the the end would come. However, she tripled her estimated life span and was in good health up until the last two weeks of her life. Only the last four days found her very ill and only the last 24 hours did she need constant care. She died at home, as she wished, with a small smile and a beautiful expression on her face. Thank you so much to all of you who sent cards, flowers and condolences to our family. She will be missed.
On a happier note, in early April Joey received the sacrament of Confirmation. This was a beautiful things for us all, as he chose our faith for himself. Of course we were hoping he would choose to be confirmed, but the choice was truly his own. He prepared well with a retreat the weekend before and two years of preparation at the church. He really thought about it and questioned what he needed to question. We hope and pray his choice will bear fruit for him throughout his life.
In May, Tony received his first Holy Communion. As usual, the sacrament was beautiful and we were delighted to see it. Five down, two to go! Bella will receive hers next Spring and Natalie the following year.
Earlier this month, Lindsey graduated from Sacred Heart School after 9 years there. She received a number of leadership, music and service awards, and we are very proud of her. She will go to Paraclete High School in the fall. Time does fly!
Julia recently moved up another level in gymnastics. As a new level 6 she gets to compete optional rather than compulsory routines, which means she can choose her own combinations of elements as well as her floor music. She just returned from a week at Woodward West camp in Tehachapi where she was able to master a number of new skills. I love watching her grow and excel in her chosen sport, and she is truly a joy to watch.
Also in the extreme sports category, Sam also was at Woodward West last week but in the scooter program. He is getting very good on his scooter and learned a back and front flip while he was there. I tried for awhile to get the video on here but failed completely. So, you will have to trust me, he is awesome!
On the cancer front, I have just started a new chemo regime to get back on top of the slow creep we have been experiencing of late. It is a good strategic move, but my body is not enjoying it as much as it could. I am now on a new combo for Her2+ specific cancer and am, for the first time, on Taxol which is not targeted and affects all rapidly dividing cells. I am almost to certain to lose my hair (again!) in the next week or so and am experiencing a decent amount of bone and muscle pain as well as fatigue. So it goes. If it works, it is worth it all.
Finally, we are taking our every-other year family vacation, courtesy of Jay's airline miles and hotel points, next week. 10 days in Hawaii (Kauai and Kona), nine people, totally free, flights, hotel and rental cars. This is our reward for Jay's near-constant travel. Speaking of that, he is in Israel this week and having a wonderful time exploring Nazareth and the surrounding areas when he is done with his work day.
Hope all is well with you all and that your summer is blessed with all good things!
Most significantly, on Memorial Day we lost Jay's mom Elizabeth Lester at the age of 80. She lived about two miles away from us and was very involved in the kids' lives. She was a great help to us all in terms of driving the kids home from school and taking them to buy the things they needed, bringing dinner over regularly, delivering things we needed from Costco, etc. Losing her was a big blow to our family and we miss her. She loved to take the kids to the zoo, the library and many other places, even when it got hard for her.
Liz had a peaceful and happy death, which is all any of us can ask for. We have known for about a year and a half that she had an ocular melanoma and, as she chose no treatment, that the the end would come. However, she tripled her estimated life span and was in good health up until the last two weeks of her life. Only the last four days found her very ill and only the last 24 hours did she need constant care. She died at home, as she wished, with a small smile and a beautiful expression on her face. Thank you so much to all of you who sent cards, flowers and condolences to our family. She will be missed.
On a happier note, in early April Joey received the sacrament of Confirmation. This was a beautiful things for us all, as he chose our faith for himself. Of course we were hoping he would choose to be confirmed, but the choice was truly his own. He prepared well with a retreat the weekend before and two years of preparation at the church. He really thought about it and questioned what he needed to question. We hope and pray his choice will bear fruit for him throughout his life.
In May, Tony received his first Holy Communion. As usual, the sacrament was beautiful and we were delighted to see it. Five down, two to go! Bella will receive hers next Spring and Natalie the following year.
Earlier this month, Lindsey graduated from Sacred Heart School after 9 years there. She received a number of leadership, music and service awards, and we are very proud of her. She will go to Paraclete High School in the fall. Time does fly!
Julia recently moved up another level in gymnastics. As a new level 6 she gets to compete optional rather than compulsory routines, which means she can choose her own combinations of elements as well as her floor music. She just returned from a week at Woodward West camp in Tehachapi where she was able to master a number of new skills. I love watching her grow and excel in her chosen sport, and she is truly a joy to watch.
Also in the extreme sports category, Sam also was at Woodward West last week but in the scooter program. He is getting very good on his scooter and learned a back and front flip while he was there. I tried for awhile to get the video on here but failed completely. So, you will have to trust me, he is awesome!
On the cancer front, I have just started a new chemo regime to get back on top of the slow creep we have been experiencing of late. It is a good strategic move, but my body is not enjoying it as much as it could. I am now on a new combo for Her2+ specific cancer and am, for the first time, on Taxol which is not targeted and affects all rapidly dividing cells. I am almost to certain to lose my hair (again!) in the next week or so and am experiencing a decent amount of bone and muscle pain as well as fatigue. So it goes. If it works, it is worth it all.
Finally, we are taking our every-other year family vacation, courtesy of Jay's airline miles and hotel points, next week. 10 days in Hawaii (Kauai and Kona), nine people, totally free, flights, hotel and rental cars. This is our reward for Jay's near-constant travel. Speaking of that, he is in Israel this week and having a wonderful time exploring Nazareth and the surrounding areas when he is done with his work day.
Hope all is well with you all and that your summer is blessed with all good things!
Thursday, May 15, 2014
News from the Front
It's been awhile since I've posted an update on my own personal war on cancer, so that will be today's topic.
Overall, I continue to do very well, thanks be to God.
Physically, I am able to do nearly everything I need to, although I do struggle with fatigue, some nausea and vomiting, and mild to moderate pain from the bones mets. Other, lesser side effects, such as nasal and skin problems, mouth sores, etc. also continue, but you know what? I can live with all of this!
I am definitely not as sharp as I used to be. Areas such as short term memory, multi-tasking, planning ahead and distractibility constantly plague me, but I am no longer embarrassed about these deficiencies. They have simply become a part of who I am now. Happily, I am still able to learn (and remember it for awhile) and help my kids with their school work, but if you ask me about a movie I saw a few months ago I am unlikely to remember having seen it. Which can be fun if it was a good one, as I can experience it all over again!
I had a brain scan yesterday and the news was a bit of a mixed bag, but more good than not. The tumor that was gamma knifed in February has shrunk substantially, but there are two others that seem to be slowly growing that we will need to continue to watch closely. One was the tumor that was treated individually about two years ago with stereotactic radiation, which is unfortunate. That means we only have one more shot at it before I hit max radiation for the area. This, at the moment, is my greatest concern, but I am not worrying excessively about any of it. It is what it is, and I have lots of wonderful things to distract me.
Thankfully, all other major organs remain clear and, outside of the brain, we are only battling bone metastases. As I have said many times, these will not kill me and are simply an annoyance to me for now. I am probably going to have to deal with the large one at the top of my right femur and possibly another active spot or two in my ribs/spine and sacrum. Not sure yet if it will be with targeted radiation or a change in medication, but either way I will take it as it comes.
I remain nothing but grateful for all the blessings I have received to help me along on this journey: my faith, my family and friends, the prayers of so many, my amazing doctors and excellent health insurance, my husband's job, etc., etc. I have a happy life and, most importantly, am filled with hope for the future both here and in the world to come.
Notice I did not say "ordered" or "calm" when describing my life. Although I have what I believe to be an unshakable inner peace, you will find no evidence of it if you drop by my house during the after-school witching hours, when chaos and disorder reigns! During these hours of sports, homework, dinner, and general craziness I often get overwhelmed. But I'm pretty sure that has nothing at all to do with the cancer, and everything to do with having seven beautiful, healthy children which, in my book, is no ailment at all.
Overall, I continue to do very well, thanks be to God.
Physically, I am able to do nearly everything I need to, although I do struggle with fatigue, some nausea and vomiting, and mild to moderate pain from the bones mets. Other, lesser side effects, such as nasal and skin problems, mouth sores, etc. also continue, but you know what? I can live with all of this!
I am definitely not as sharp as I used to be. Areas such as short term memory, multi-tasking, planning ahead and distractibility constantly plague me, but I am no longer embarrassed about these deficiencies. They have simply become a part of who I am now. Happily, I am still able to learn (and remember it for awhile) and help my kids with their school work, but if you ask me about a movie I saw a few months ago I am unlikely to remember having seen it. Which can be fun if it was a good one, as I can experience it all over again!
I had a brain scan yesterday and the news was a bit of a mixed bag, but more good than not. The tumor that was gamma knifed in February has shrunk substantially, but there are two others that seem to be slowly growing that we will need to continue to watch closely. One was the tumor that was treated individually about two years ago with stereotactic radiation, which is unfortunate. That means we only have one more shot at it before I hit max radiation for the area. This, at the moment, is my greatest concern, but I am not worrying excessively about any of it. It is what it is, and I have lots of wonderful things to distract me.
Thankfully, all other major organs remain clear and, outside of the brain, we are only battling bone metastases. As I have said many times, these will not kill me and are simply an annoyance to me for now. I am probably going to have to deal with the large one at the top of my right femur and possibly another active spot or two in my ribs/spine and sacrum. Not sure yet if it will be with targeted radiation or a change in medication, but either way I will take it as it comes.
I remain nothing but grateful for all the blessings I have received to help me along on this journey: my faith, my family and friends, the prayers of so many, my amazing doctors and excellent health insurance, my husband's job, etc., etc. I have a happy life and, most importantly, am filled with hope for the future both here and in the world to come.
Notice I did not say "ordered" or "calm" when describing my life. Although I have what I believe to be an unshakable inner peace, you will find no evidence of it if you drop by my house during the after-school witching hours, when chaos and disorder reigns! During these hours of sports, homework, dinner, and general craziness I often get overwhelmed. But I'm pretty sure that has nothing at all to do with the cancer, and everything to do with having seven beautiful, healthy children which, in my book, is no ailment at all.
Monday, May 05, 2014
Awwww
I was sniffing around in the closet when 5 year old Natalie came in to see what I was doing.
"Do you smell something funny in here?" I asked. My nose has been stuffed up for a few days and I am not smelling things as I should.
Natalie replied, "No, I don't have a very good sniffer. I have a good heart, though. That's how God blessed me."
Absolutely precious.
"Do you smell something funny in here?" I asked. My nose has been stuffed up for a few days and I am not smelling things as I should.
Natalie replied, "No, I don't have a very good sniffer. I have a good heart, though. That's how God blessed me."
Absolutely precious.
Thursday, April 10, 2014
It Could Have Been Worse
Joey recently got his learner's permit. He got it on a Friday and had his first driving lesson on Monday.
When his lesson was complete, he drove under my supervision for the first time as we headed back to his school. On the way, he was delighting me with tales of his driving prowess. Apparently, he had "killed it" on the freeway and changing lanes and in intersections. Parking, however, needed some improvement according to both him and his instructor.
While showing the proper enthusiasm for his new skills, I gently reminded him that arrogance was not a virtue and that pride usually comes before a fall, or in this case a crash.
Lo and behold, on the drive to Paraclete High School he did an excellent job using his turn signals, making complete stops and following the speed laws. He pulled into the parking lot and I assumed he was going to pull up and we would exchange seats, but he instead decided to sharpen his parking skills.
I assessed the situation and saw he was heading into a nice open space of three parking spots in a row, so all seemed well. Until, that is, he attempted to back up in order to fit more neatly inside the lines.
Still, I was not particularly worried, as we have a backup camera in the van. He put it in reverse, backed out slowly enough, but somehow did not stop as soon as he should have. I was watching the camera thinking he might be getting a little close to the car behind us but as I opened my mouth to say, "stop!" he bumped the car in the row behind us.
Thank goodness, the damage to the other car was minimal. A relatively small dent on the bumper and no obvious paint damage. It looks like it may be able to be popped out without a trace, but we are waiting to hear for sure. My car has a little more damage...we lost a reflector light and my hatch won't currently open. Still, no one was hurt, it was not enough damage to be required to report and, really, everything was fine. My relief, however, was short-lived.
At Paraclete the teachers and staff all have their names on their parking spots, so with a sinking heart I walked to read the name on the curb, although I already knew who it was. That's right, out of the dozens and dozens of cars parked in front of Paraclete High School, Joey ran into the principal's car.
As realization dawned, he scooted off to class, mortified, and I entered the principal's office with my virtual tail between my legs. (By the way, I gave him permission to leave to calm down, and he spoke with the principal himself shortly thereafter.)
Not surprisingly, the principal was very kind about the whole incident and didn't even tell me that his car was BRAND NEW. Of course we will take care of the damage and, in the sense that Joey will certainly be sharper about backing up in the future, it is likely nothing but a blessing that it happened as it did. Of course, it is possible that our principal does not yet see it that way.
In the meantime, Joey's teachers have taken to calling him "Crash", and he has an excellent story to laugh about with his children some day. Some of us in the family (not admitting to anything here) may already be laughing.
When his lesson was complete, he drove under my supervision for the first time as we headed back to his school. On the way, he was delighting me with tales of his driving prowess. Apparently, he had "killed it" on the freeway and changing lanes and in intersections. Parking, however, needed some improvement according to both him and his instructor.
While showing the proper enthusiasm for his new skills, I gently reminded him that arrogance was not a virtue and that pride usually comes before a fall, or in this case a crash.
Lo and behold, on the drive to Paraclete High School he did an excellent job using his turn signals, making complete stops and following the speed laws. He pulled into the parking lot and I assumed he was going to pull up and we would exchange seats, but he instead decided to sharpen his parking skills.
I assessed the situation and saw he was heading into a nice open space of three parking spots in a row, so all seemed well. Until, that is, he attempted to back up in order to fit more neatly inside the lines.
Still, I was not particularly worried, as we have a backup camera in the van. He put it in reverse, backed out slowly enough, but somehow did not stop as soon as he should have. I was watching the camera thinking he might be getting a little close to the car behind us but as I opened my mouth to say, "stop!" he bumped the car in the row behind us.
Thank goodness, the damage to the other car was minimal. A relatively small dent on the bumper and no obvious paint damage. It looks like it may be able to be popped out without a trace, but we are waiting to hear for sure. My car has a little more damage...we lost a reflector light and my hatch won't currently open. Still, no one was hurt, it was not enough damage to be required to report and, really, everything was fine. My relief, however, was short-lived.
At Paraclete the teachers and staff all have their names on their parking spots, so with a sinking heart I walked to read the name on the curb, although I already knew who it was. That's right, out of the dozens and dozens of cars parked in front of Paraclete High School, Joey ran into the principal's car.
As realization dawned, he scooted off to class, mortified, and I entered the principal's office with my virtual tail between my legs. (By the way, I gave him permission to leave to calm down, and he spoke with the principal himself shortly thereafter.)
Not surprisingly, the principal was very kind about the whole incident and didn't even tell me that his car was BRAND NEW. Of course we will take care of the damage and, in the sense that Joey will certainly be sharper about backing up in the future, it is likely nothing but a blessing that it happened as it did. Of course, it is possible that our principal does not yet see it that way.
In the meantime, Joey's teachers have taken to calling him "Crash", and he has an excellent story to laugh about with his children some day. Some of us in the family (not admitting to anything here) may already be laughing.
Sunday, March 30, 2014
My God Tag
As part of my lay Christian vocation, I try to keep the presence of God with me throughout the day. Anyone can tell how well I am doing with this at any time by my demeanor. When I am successful I smile a lot and think of other people. When I am ignoring it I lose my smile and turn into myself.
One way I work on this is by finding little things that remind me of God at various times of the day. I associate things I do regularly with little aspirations that bring me back to him when I am thinking about other things.
For example, when I climb the stairs in my house I think of God. There is a particular thing I tend to leave on my bathroom counter each morning, so when I manage to put it away I think of God. If I later find it there I think of how I didn't think of him earlier and think of him then instead. Like many of you, I try to say the Angelus each day at noon or close to it. When I am in a hurry on a street with lots of red lights, I ask Mary to intercede for me and clear the way with green lights (I have found, by the way, that she is excellent at obtaining this particular favor for me, but only if I am late for reasons outside my control). And so on and so forth.
As often happens in the middle of the world, I sometimes find myself completely wrapped up in my own thoughts and plans and forget about these little things. But I try to get back to them as soon as I realize I have drifted away from them. Nonetheless, I have definitely been in need of help staying focused in this area and, surprise (!), help has arrived.
A few years ago, an anonymous friend left a bracelet for me on top of my purse while I was singing at mass. I have no idea who it was, but the person left a very nice card and box with the 2011 Brighton Breast Cancer Bracelet in it. I absolutely loved it and wore it constantly.
Later that same year when I found myself very sick post whole brain radiation, I was visited in the hospital by Fr. Paul Donlon, a priest of Opus Dei. He told me all about the scapular and enrolled me in it that very day. Over the past several years I have tried many ways to wear the scapular and have not been successful. I don't do well with necklaces of any kind and have to take them off each time I have a scan so they tend to get tangled or broken or lost.
I finally noted that a friend of mine wore a tiny scapular medal like a charm on her watch, so I got the brilliant idea of adding a small scapular to my beloved bracelet. I took it to my favorite jeweler and asked him to add the little scapular I brought along. Unfortunately, there was an incident during the post-soldering chemical bath when an unexpected metal was found in the bracelet. It's reaction to the solution dissolved part of the bracelet and stained the scapular charm a dark brown. I was so sorry to lose that bracelet and medal! However, the jeweler (who felt as bad as I did) worked with me to find another bracelet and scapular charm, and I am very happy with the result.
The new bracelet and scapular medal make a little noise when I move my arm, a jingle quite similar to that of a dog's tag on his collar. I soon realized that every time I hear that jingle it can remind me of the fact that I belong to God. So, if I happen to be shaking my fist or gesturing at something in anger, that little jingle can bring me back to the presence of God. If it sings when I am turning the steering wheel in the car, it can remind me to pray for a safe journey. The possibilities are endless! It is like a little bell from heaven, reminding me of what is really important, no matter where I am or what I am doing.
So now I have to do my part: I can't shut it out or let it become part of the noise of my life! I have to listen for it and use it the best way I am able.
I think I can, I think I can...
One way I work on this is by finding little things that remind me of God at various times of the day. I associate things I do regularly with little aspirations that bring me back to him when I am thinking about other things.
For example, when I climb the stairs in my house I think of God. There is a particular thing I tend to leave on my bathroom counter each morning, so when I manage to put it away I think of God. If I later find it there I think of how I didn't think of him earlier and think of him then instead. Like many of you, I try to say the Angelus each day at noon or close to it. When I am in a hurry on a street with lots of red lights, I ask Mary to intercede for me and clear the way with green lights (I have found, by the way, that she is excellent at obtaining this particular favor for me, but only if I am late for reasons outside my control). And so on and so forth.
As often happens in the middle of the world, I sometimes find myself completely wrapped up in my own thoughts and plans and forget about these little things. But I try to get back to them as soon as I realize I have drifted away from them. Nonetheless, I have definitely been in need of help staying focused in this area and, surprise (!), help has arrived.
A few years ago, an anonymous friend left a bracelet for me on top of my purse while I was singing at mass. I have no idea who it was, but the person left a very nice card and box with the 2011 Brighton Breast Cancer Bracelet in it. I absolutely loved it and wore it constantly.
Later that same year when I found myself very sick post whole brain radiation, I was visited in the hospital by Fr. Paul Donlon, a priest of Opus Dei. He told me all about the scapular and enrolled me in it that very day. Over the past several years I have tried many ways to wear the scapular and have not been successful. I don't do well with necklaces of any kind and have to take them off each time I have a scan so they tend to get tangled or broken or lost.
I finally noted that a friend of mine wore a tiny scapular medal like a charm on her watch, so I got the brilliant idea of adding a small scapular to my beloved bracelet. I took it to my favorite jeweler and asked him to add the little scapular I brought along. Unfortunately, there was an incident during the post-soldering chemical bath when an unexpected metal was found in the bracelet. It's reaction to the solution dissolved part of the bracelet and stained the scapular charm a dark brown. I was so sorry to lose that bracelet and medal! However, the jeweler (who felt as bad as I did) worked with me to find another bracelet and scapular charm, and I am very happy with the result.
The new bracelet and scapular medal make a little noise when I move my arm, a jingle quite similar to that of a dog's tag on his collar. I soon realized that every time I hear that jingle it can remind me of the fact that I belong to God. So, if I happen to be shaking my fist or gesturing at something in anger, that little jingle can bring me back to the presence of God. If it sings when I am turning the steering wheel in the car, it can remind me to pray for a safe journey. The possibilities are endless! It is like a little bell from heaven, reminding me of what is really important, no matter where I am or what I am doing.
So now I have to do my part: I can't shut it out or let it become part of the noise of my life! I have to listen for it and use it the best way I am able.
I think I can, I think I can...
Saturday, March 15, 2014
Escapade
I am posting from New Orleans where I am enjoying a perfect girl's getaway weekend with two of my very best friends. Jennifer, Lori and I arrived last night, settled in to our quirky Garden District hotel and have been eating, shopping, riding streetcars and most of all laughing--the kind of laughter that makes your stomach muscles ache--ever since.
Jennifer and I have been friends since second grade and together met Lori more than 25 years ago. Needless to say, we know each other very well and have a great time together no matter where we are. We have been there for one another through weddings, babies, deaths, career changes, graduations, major illnesses and teenage children, among other things. I am truly blessed to have friends like these in my life and am treasuring every moment of this rare time we have all together.
Here are some photos of today so far, as we are taking a short break between beignets and jambalaya, leaving me with a moment to post. Oh, and lest you think we are not burning off those calories, we have walked six miles today (love the pedometer) and we are not done yet!
Jennifer and I have been friends since second grade and together met Lori more than 25 years ago. Needless to say, we know each other very well and have a great time together no matter where we are. We have been there for one another through weddings, babies, deaths, career changes, graduations, major illnesses and teenage children, among other things. I am truly blessed to have friends like these in my life and am treasuring every moment of this rare time we have all together.
Here are some photos of today so far, as we are taking a short break between beignets and jambalaya, leaving me with a moment to post. Oh, and lest you think we are not burning off those calories, we have walked six miles today (love the pedometer) and we are not done yet!
At Cafe Du Monde
The Cathedral in Jackson Square
French Market
Classic!
Off to dinner now... I will try to post some more photos tomorrow.
Thursday, March 13, 2014
Interpretations
As I sit here waiting for my chemo to come out of the pharmacy and begin its slow drip into my veins, it gives me a rare opportunity to browse headlines, something I usually avoid. Today, however, I am quite interested in the missing airplane near Malaysia and am anxious to learn what has become of it and the more than 200 souls aboard.
In searching for news on the plane, I was immediately distracted when I came upon a story about how the beloved Disney movie Frozen has been interpreted by some as forwarding the gay agenda. I racked my brain to think of what could be in the film that might possibly be interpreted that way, as I have seen it many times with my kids and listen to the music almost daily when driving kids from place to place and have never noticed anything of the sort. I came up with nothing. So, I read this post by a fellow blogger but of the Mormon variety.
Based on the comments I found on that post (which really ran the gamut as you might imagine), I was equally interested to learn that someone else reported Frozen to be the "most Christian movie they had seen all year". This post, in fact, describes the parallels between Frozen and Dante's Inferno. It's amazing how people can see the very same thing so very differently, isn't it?
Both sides supported their arguments with evidence from the film and made semi-logical conclusions based on the facts presented. Nonetheless, I thought I would take a minute a propose a crazy theory of my own:
What if this entire story is totally fictional, cleverly created for our enjoyment, without any underlying, hidden meaning at all? What if the characters don't stand for anything except what they appear to be? What if there is no agenda at all behind this delightful film?
People see what they want to see. I, for one, want to see an entertaining film with something in it for all my children: princesses, heroes, villains and, of course, a talking and singing reindeer and snowman. I loved this movie and want only to see what it meant to all of us. I highly doubt that my kids are going to dig for a deeper meaning as they sing, "Let it Go" over and over, nor do I fear that images of hell or homosexuals or (gasp!) beastiality will burn themselves into their brains without us being aware of it. Let's face it: in our current society, when those who want to promote these types of messages are busy promoting them, they are hardly subtle about it, and you don't have to look for them. Rather, they assault you.
In conclusion, I want to thank the "Well Behaved Mormon Woman" and the writer who put forth the idea of Dante's Inferno on The Blaze for giving me something to blog about today and for their considered opinions that made me think about my own.
In searching for news on the plane, I was immediately distracted when I came upon a story about how the beloved Disney movie Frozen has been interpreted by some as forwarding the gay agenda. I racked my brain to think of what could be in the film that might possibly be interpreted that way, as I have seen it many times with my kids and listen to the music almost daily when driving kids from place to place and have never noticed anything of the sort. I came up with nothing. So, I read this post by a fellow blogger but of the Mormon variety.
Based on the comments I found on that post (which really ran the gamut as you might imagine), I was equally interested to learn that someone else reported Frozen to be the "most Christian movie they had seen all year". This post, in fact, describes the parallels between Frozen and Dante's Inferno. It's amazing how people can see the very same thing so very differently, isn't it?
Both sides supported their arguments with evidence from the film and made semi-logical conclusions based on the facts presented. Nonetheless, I thought I would take a minute a propose a crazy theory of my own:
What if this entire story is totally fictional, cleverly created for our enjoyment, without any underlying, hidden meaning at all? What if the characters don't stand for anything except what they appear to be? What if there is no agenda at all behind this delightful film?
People see what they want to see. I, for one, want to see an entertaining film with something in it for all my children: princesses, heroes, villains and, of course, a talking and singing reindeer and snowman. I loved this movie and want only to see what it meant to all of us. I highly doubt that my kids are going to dig for a deeper meaning as they sing, "Let it Go" over and over, nor do I fear that images of hell or homosexuals or (gasp!) beastiality will burn themselves into their brains without us being aware of it. Let's face it: in our current society, when those who want to promote these types of messages are busy promoting them, they are hardly subtle about it, and you don't have to look for them. Rather, they assault you.
In conclusion, I want to thank the "Well Behaved Mormon Woman" and the writer who put forth the idea of Dante's Inferno on The Blaze for giving me something to blog about today and for their considered opinions that made me think about my own.
Friday, February 21, 2014
The Full Report
WARNING: DO NOT PROCEED IF YOU DON'T WANT TO SEE ME IN THE GAMMA KNIFE FRAME!!!
It has been two weeks since the gamma knife and I am starting to feel more or less normal, but with a little wear and tear.
Overall, the procedure was not terrible. To my surprise, I was not knocked out for the placement of the frame. I almost panicked when I saw the dental-style chair awaiting me with the frame screws carefully laid out alongside it and nothing between it and my skull other than four shots of lidocaine in the four locations where the screws were headed.
Soon, my fears were calmed by a fast-acting milligram of Ativan and I was able to relax a little. Not enough to fail to notice the pain of the injections or ignore the eerie sensation of my skull becoming numb. Just like when the dentist numbs your lip and you experience a subsequent sensation of the numb part of your face being huge, so happened with my skull. My head felt like a giant, hard helmet to the touch. After the shots were in, though, I felt no pain.
Immediately after the frame was in place, I was measured in a fish bowl-like structure that made me look like an alien.
Don't ask me why I'm smiling in all of these pictures...must be an effect of all the brain radiation I've had, because there is really no other explanation beyond the fact that I got to sleep a lot that day and spend the whole day more or less alone (meaning without kids) with my husband, which rarely happens. We always have fun together, no matter what we are doing. Even this.
After my first MRI in the frame I had some time while they planned and programmed the radiation I was to receive later. I used that time to eat as I was not allowed to eat before the placement of the frame. It seemed like a good idea until I actually tried to get food into my mouth with the frame on. It is hard to see it in the photo above, but there was not enough room between the bottom of the frame and my mouth to drink without a contorted straw nor eat without using my fingers to shove tiny bites of food into my mouth which could not open far enough to receive them given the base of frame at my chin which blocked my jaw. Judging by Jay's reaction, it was quite amusing. I don't believe I was smiling quite so much at that point. Thankfully, there are no pictures of that to share.
After being inserted into a machine that looked like a giant hair dryer at the salon with tiny holes all around it, only metal and horizontal, and having my frame locked into the table, I promptly fell asleep. Clearly I have quite of bit of experience with being strapped to tables and being put into tiny spaces. It not only doesn't rattle me, but it is some of the best sleep I ever get. So, I really don't know how long it took, but I don't remember hearing any noise (unlike the MRI which puts me to sleep with its loud, rhythmic thumping) and I was surprised when I woke up that it was over so soon.
After that, they disconnected me, gave me some decadron to control the swelling in the brain and some antiseizure medicine as a precaucion and sent me on my way looking more or less like Chris Everett. But where is my racket?
For the first few days I felt surprisingly well. I soon realized, as I crashed into exhaustion and cloudiness for a few days after that, that it must have been from the decadron (a steroid which I really don't care for because it makes me eat uncontrollably...recall 2011 when I gained 38 pounds in 6 weeks while taking it through my whole brain radiation).
Happily, I am mostly back to my version of normal with only two little exceptions, which my doctor assures me are temporary. First, my ears have been plugged up to some degree constantly since a few days after the treatment. I thought it was a minor cold, as a few of my family members have nasty coughs right now, but was mystified when I failed to clear them with the "scuba diver" technique of plugging the nose and blowing, and even real Sudafed would not open them up. My doctor told me it was very possibly a result of minor swelling in the brain that simply pushed them out a little and that over time they will open up. As a singer, this is very disconcerting to me. However, it does bring along the benefit of dulling the noise of seven active children, so I may go into shock when they eventually clear.
The other minor effect is almost fun. When I move the skin around the scab on my left forehead. it feels like the top of my head is wiggling instead. Some weird nerve thing I guess. Very low on my totem pole.
So, now we wait. Four more weeks until I will have the MRI which will give us some preliminary information as to whether or not this worked. My doctors are confident that it has and I share that optimism.
Now, once again, we are slowly climbing up the roller coaster track. Here's hoping for less height and more level track going forward!
It has been two weeks since the gamma knife and I am starting to feel more or less normal, but with a little wear and tear.
Overall, the procedure was not terrible. To my surprise, I was not knocked out for the placement of the frame. I almost panicked when I saw the dental-style chair awaiting me with the frame screws carefully laid out alongside it and nothing between it and my skull other than four shots of lidocaine in the four locations where the screws were headed.
Soon, my fears were calmed by a fast-acting milligram of Ativan and I was able to relax a little. Not enough to fail to notice the pain of the injections or ignore the eerie sensation of my skull becoming numb. Just like when the dentist numbs your lip and you experience a subsequent sensation of the numb part of your face being huge, so happened with my skull. My head felt like a giant, hard helmet to the touch. After the shots were in, though, I felt no pain.
Immediately after the frame was in place, I was measured in a fish bowl-like structure that made me look like an alien.
Don't ask me why I'm smiling in all of these pictures...must be an effect of all the brain radiation I've had, because there is really no other explanation beyond the fact that I got to sleep a lot that day and spend the whole day more or less alone (meaning without kids) with my husband, which rarely happens. We always have fun together, no matter what we are doing. Even this.
After my first MRI in the frame I had some time while they planned and programmed the radiation I was to receive later. I used that time to eat as I was not allowed to eat before the placement of the frame. It seemed like a good idea until I actually tried to get food into my mouth with the frame on. It is hard to see it in the photo above, but there was not enough room between the bottom of the frame and my mouth to drink without a contorted straw nor eat without using my fingers to shove tiny bites of food into my mouth which could not open far enough to receive them given the base of frame at my chin which blocked my jaw. Judging by Jay's reaction, it was quite amusing. I don't believe I was smiling quite so much at that point. Thankfully, there are no pictures of that to share.
After being inserted into a machine that looked like a giant hair dryer at the salon with tiny holes all around it, only metal and horizontal, and having my frame locked into the table, I promptly fell asleep. Clearly I have quite of bit of experience with being strapped to tables and being put into tiny spaces. It not only doesn't rattle me, but it is some of the best sleep I ever get. So, I really don't know how long it took, but I don't remember hearing any noise (unlike the MRI which puts me to sleep with its loud, rhythmic thumping) and I was surprised when I woke up that it was over so soon.
After that, they disconnected me, gave me some decadron to control the swelling in the brain and some antiseizure medicine as a precaucion and sent me on my way looking more or less like Chris Everett. But where is my racket?
For the first few days I felt surprisingly well. I soon realized, as I crashed into exhaustion and cloudiness for a few days after that, that it must have been from the decadron (a steroid which I really don't care for because it makes me eat uncontrollably...recall 2011 when I gained 38 pounds in 6 weeks while taking it through my whole brain radiation).
Happily, I am mostly back to my version of normal with only two little exceptions, which my doctor assures me are temporary. First, my ears have been plugged up to some degree constantly since a few days after the treatment. I thought it was a minor cold, as a few of my family members have nasty coughs right now, but was mystified when I failed to clear them with the "scuba diver" technique of plugging the nose and blowing, and even real Sudafed would not open them up. My doctor told me it was very possibly a result of minor swelling in the brain that simply pushed them out a little and that over time they will open up. As a singer, this is very disconcerting to me. However, it does bring along the benefit of dulling the noise of seven active children, so I may go into shock when they eventually clear.
The other minor effect is almost fun. When I move the skin around the scab on my left forehead. it feels like the top of my head is wiggling instead. Some weird nerve thing I guess. Very low on my totem pole.
So, now we wait. Four more weeks until I will have the MRI which will give us some preliminary information as to whether or not this worked. My doctors are confident that it has and I share that optimism.
Now, once again, we are slowly climbing up the roller coaster track. Here's hoping for less height and more level track going forward!
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